Auf Wiedersehen, Emily!

Can we reiterate that we just don't get where she's coming from when she calls her designs "underground?"

Y'know, it's not the worst thing we've seen on that runway. It's arguably not even the worst thing seen on the runway last night.

In the "points added" column, she did a pretty good job interpreting her source image. And let's face it, none of those dresses last night really did all that hot a job of "capturing" New York at night. This was at least one of the best efforts in that regard.

In the "points taken away" column, it's a yawningly basic dress which required that all the work be done by the embellishment and frankly, the embellishment failed to do its job.

We are of course, talking about that "Donny and Marie, circa 1978" skating costume ruffle.

It's just so weird, the way she arranged it. We might be persuaded that a ruffle like that could work on a dress, but thought needs to be put into where and how much of it is going to be applied. Why does it cut right across her boobs like that? And then right down her stomach to come to a stop right at her cooch? What is that? Is that how they do it "underground?"

At this point in our PR-watching careers, it's like watching mice in cages react the same way over and over again to certain stimuli. It's kind of psycho- and sociologically interesting to see all the patterns of behavior play themselves out repeatedly. Last night, Emily stepped into the "Delusional" role as she walked away from Tim's rather harsh and pointed criticism of her dress and said, "Tim gave me kind of a mixed review but I have my own sense of style, direction. I'm happy with my dress."

Honey, when Tim starts off a sentence with "I'm worried about the judges," he ain't talking about their health. "Mixed review," my ass.

By the way, anyone notice the dress on that Elle cover behind her? Deliberate or subconscious inspiration? You make the call!

And as far as designers having their own "style" and "direction," that's all well and good and it can even work in your favor sometimes in the judging, but until you get your ass to Bryant Park, you need to consider those judges to get through the competition.

Personally, we wouldn't have auf'd her, but it's exactly the kind of thing those judges love to hate.

And let's face it, when Nina can't even be bothered to say anything about your dress, you've committed the gravest of PR sins. You have bored Nina. Pack up your headbands, girl. You're going home.

Her exit video:




More detailed pictures:




[Photo: Bravo/Barbara Nitke - Screencaps: Projectrungay.blogspot.com - Video: Bravotv.com]
[Additional Pictures: Courtesy of ProjectRunway.com]

Daniel & Emily

Daniel, honey. Seriously. Do some deep breathing, talk to your doctor to see if Xanax is right for you, buy some crystals, masturbate - whatever. Just calm down.

Because honey, even your dress looks nervous. It looks fussed over and disheveled and unsure of itself; like she's going to spend the night in the corner adjusting her bra straps and picking imaginary lint off herself.

The proportions are way off on this thing and nothing looks well fitted or well executed.

The bodice is shapeless and unflattering. The placement of the straps/cap sleeves makes her look wider than she is and the waist can't seem to decide where it wants to sit on her.

We do like the skirt, especially from behind.

We get the impression there's a kernel of creativity and skill there with Daniel. But we're not kidding, his high anxiety is gonna kill him in this contest. The likelihood of his impending psychotic break increases with each challenge. He's gonna be a puddle of sweat with a damp tie floating in it if he makes it to Bryant Park.

Emily talks a big game about how her work is "underground," but so far, we don't see it.

Or is "underground" the new slang for "three sizes too small?" Put a bow in her hair and she's a slutty Baby Snooks.

It's not all bad. We really like the braiding in the bodice - and that's saying something because we rarely like braided fabric.

And the back of it's not bad.

It's just the utterly bizarre proportions on this thing. Everything either sits too low or rides too high; the cups make her boobs look small (and low) and the skirt makes her hips look wide and her legs look heavy. Could've been cute, but the execution was a big fail.

[Photos: Projectrunway.com/Bravo/Barbara Nitke - Screencaps: Projectrungay.blogspot.com]

Leanne, Emily & Suede

Shitfire, there's a ton of dresses! Let's MOVE IT!

"I'm the silent fashion assassin."

Honey. Parading around the Ren Faire in your homemade Arwen costume doesn't make you badass. Let's look at your portfolio, shall we?

A little too cute and a little overworked, but there's talent there.

Model: Karalyn

Didn't love it. Again, it's a little too cute and a little overworked. We do like how she handled the coffee filters, though.

But that's just a monstrosity. It looks like it weighs ten pounds and that poor girl will be wearing nothing but a syrupy frock if the temperature ever went above 90.

Who?

Were the producers fucking with us when they picked a half-dozen designers that look alike? Is there going to be a surprise reveal halfway through the season that these girls are all sextuplets or something, like that show on TLC where that cute biracial couple gave birth to a litter of biracial children and now all they do is yell at each other and not have sex?

We like. Basic, but chic. These portfolios don't always demonstrate a lot of restraint, so it's nice to see it here.

Speaking of restraint...

Model: Leslie

That's the opposite of it.

The ONLY positive thing we can say about this look is that she demonstrated a fine sense of color. The hues in that collar are fun.

And we suspect the collar itself is supposed to be fun but it looks like a centerpiece at a middle school dance. It's just a little too arts-and-crafty. It doesn't help that the dress isn't exactly memorable and she didn't manage to make anything look more expensive than it was.

"I got tired of making millions for the rest of the world and decided Suede needed to make millions for Suede and Suede is gonna rock it. Yeah!! Whackadoodle!!"

There's one word from that quote with which we totally agree. Guess it.

Not our taste, but it looks polished. It also looks like an ad for Jordache from the '80s.

And our little Suede may just be a crier. He definitely looked like he wanted to sit down with a box of Kleenex and have a good one after Tim eviscerated him. Don't let us down, girl. Tears, and lots of them.

Model: Tia

Meh.

It's not horrible, but it's certainly not worthy of any real praise. Basic, basic, basic.

A big problem is the "fabric" itself. There was simply no way to disguise that it came from a cheap tablecloth. The little last-minute additions didn't really help hide that.

Nor did the fact that it looks like he just wrapped it around her and stapled it up the back.

Not an impressive first effort. Suede needs to step it up for Suede or Suede is going home.

Yeah!!

Whackadoodle!!

More pics:







[Photos: Bravo/Barbara Nitke - Screencaps: Projectrungay.blogspot.com]
[Additional Pictures: Courtesy of projectrunway.com]